Every now and then,
things will go badly wrong.
Someone will be
injured, you will get lost, or you will find out that you’ve just lost a huge
amount of money.
Your natural
reaction now may be to panic. After all, why wouldn’t you get in a fluster?
What will you do now that you’ve lost the money? What will happen to your
friend or relative who just fainted and is now lying there looking very unwell?
But while
panicking is natural, it’s also entirely unhelpful.
If this is your response, then you will be likely to make matters worse not better and you will
potentially cause more problems than you solve.
The best response
is to stay calm and robotic. You may appear cold and emotionless, but this is
the most efficient and useful way to react to such a situation. This is how
you’re going to help everyone deal with the problem – you can panic, cry or
mourn later.
The question
though, is how you can overcome that initial emotional response. How can you
keep cool when everything is going awry around you?
Breathe and Slow Down
The first thing to
do is to step back and take a moment to breathe and to assess the situation.
That initial urge
to rush in or to cry is caused by a flood of adrenaline – your fight or flight
hormone. This can be immensely useful for fuelling your reaction speed,
increasing muscular strength and more. Unfortunately, it also suppresses
activity in the prefrontal cortex – the part of the brain that we use for
future planning and reasoning.
So instead, you
need to learn to control your breathing and to calm yourself down. This will
reactivate your ‘rest and digest’ state via your parasympathetic nervous
system. So breathe in through the stomach deeply and then let it fill your
lungs.
You are not in a
massive rush. If you rush, you will make matters worse. Even in time critical
situations, remember the adage: less haste, more speed.
Look for the Answer
Now look for the
best solution the problem at hand. Try to remove yourself emotionally from the
situation by looking at it as an outsider. Think of this like an exercise and
try to narrow down your actions to
the most useful few options.
While in this
scenario, you might be afraid to act. Each action you consider will likely have
the risk of a negative outcome and might
still make matters worse. But once
you’ve considered carefully the options and efficiently weighed up the best
course of action, the next step is simply to act. Even if you are uncertain, take positive and decisive action.
Doing this means
accepting the possibility that things might go wrong and that it might be your
fault. In other words, it means accepting your responsibility and being willing
to shoulder that responsibility if
necessary. It means being able and willing to put yourself out on a limb and to
face the storm that might come.


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